Insecure Writers: Trust Isn't Just a Group-Bonding Exercise

NOTE: It's the first Wednesday of the month, so it's time for The Insecure Writers! For those who don't remember, it's an online group created by Alex J. Cavanaugh for writers. Most of whom are insecure. So we support each other from the safety and comfort of our desks. 

I usually spend IWSG Wednesdays indulging my neurotic brain, and cataloging with loving detail all the ways that I'm feeling insecure about writing, which a) satisfies my detail-oriented (read: anal-retentive) personality, and b) helps me feel a little less crazy.

Much as I enjoy and appreciate this electronic therapy, I'm going to do something a little bit different today.

First, a confession: I may, from time to time, just slightly exaggerate things on this blog for the sake of humor. You know, just every single post every once in a while. In reality, I work pretty hard - and sometimes even (gasp) successfully!! - to stay calm and positive and focused.

I have a number of tools that help me do this. Running (the best stress relief known to mankind), music, and deep breathing all help. Meditation would probably help even more, but since I cannot get my monkey mind to settle down and stop flinging poop at me for longer than three seconds, I wouldn't know.

There's one other thing that helps, maybe more than anything else: trust.

Some people might call it faith. Others might call it confidence. I'm a writer, so I get reeeeaally anal about choosing the exact right word. For me, it's trust.

I didn't come up with this on my own; I had some help (which is so essential for writers). About a year and a half ago, I was knee-deep in Cloudland, still trying to finish a first draft. At the time, I was in the process of banging my head repeatedly and with great futility on a plot wall, and was feeling stuck. Very, very stuck. I confessed this to one of my clients (yes, people do talk to me during massages. A lot of people, actually), and she told me something I've never forgotten. She's a composer, so she talks in terms of music, but the idea is universal.

She said that whenever she's having trouble composing, she reminds herself to trust that the finished piece exists inside her, already. Her only job is to discover it.

What an amazing thought.

This is what I remind myself now, whenever I get really afraid, or stuck. The story exists inside me, complete and perfect. I'm not so much creating a plot as I am uncovering it.

Let me tell you, when I can manage to remember this, and believe it, it takes so much pressure off of the process. I don't have to tear my hair out over making the right decisions or solving gnarly plot problems, because I already know what to do. All I have to do is trust myself, and the story will come out.

Maybe this sounds nuts, or New Age-y, or naive. That's OK by me, because it works. Not just for writing, either. It works in so many areas of life.

And that's pretty amazing, if you ask me.

The Secret to Great Writing - and Life

I've done it, everyone. I've discovered the secret to writing, and maybe even to LIFE, the universe, and everything. And no, it's no 42. At least not as far as I can tell.

It's called vacation.

Yes, I know, not the most innovative idea, but that's what I'm on this week. In Vermont. One of my favorite places on the planet. As I write this post, I'm sitting on the porch of the coziest, homiest, most welcoming inn you can imagine, looking up as the sun begins to set behind the soft, gentle slopes of the Green Mountains, and breathing in the summer smells of grass, old wood, and growing life. One of the inn's barn cats is curled up next to me, purring.

Yup. No complaints here.

So, I'm going to take a break from desperate hoarding, bad habits, and general writing insecurities, and... well, actually, I'm just going to take a break.

I apologize for the total lack of useful or insightful writing information in this post, or really any information at all. I did reveal the secret to great writing, though, so that counts for something, right?

Right?

Oh, well.

I'll be back next week with a full post - and I'll catch up on reading all of my weekly blogs then (I owe all of you a really interesting and conversation-starting comment).

I'll leave you with this last thought: M.L. Swift is my hero. You should all visit his blog. If you can now a) follow me on Twitter or Google+; b) follow this blog; or c) find me at all, it is thanks in large part to this man. I am hugely grateful, and you can all blame him if I keep popping up in your feeds from now on.